The Power of Curiosity… in Internet Dating…

Curiosity… or in Samoan Terms “faikakalaty”. I mean, Curiosity is making you read this right now… (unless you are related to me, and I forced you to read this.thanks!)

It’s a powerful thing, and can make people act in “criminal-like” ways. I mean how many times have we heard something, and thought “hmmm, maybe I should check that out”. I guess its a healthy feeling too, as it makes us wonder… and puts our minds in ‘Creativity Mode’ expecting the worst or something juicy will come out of what you’re curious about….or like me… the chance to learn something new (i take the angelic approach to it… lol)

The year 2006 was a really bad year for me, my sister Shar suggested I go online to find a friend overseas as that was the “in thing” to do. I was curious…so, In March 2006, I went on a Samoan Website to see what the fuss was about and to look for a friend in Samoa, who I can chat too about the weather lol

This was a new territory for me, chatting with someone I didn’t even know. Scanning through the profiles, i could feel my fingers shaking, and sweat building up. I put it off for a couple of weeks as just thinking about it gave me panic attacks lol One day I decided to talk myself through it lol it went something like this… (hey… its normal to talk to yourself!…. lol)

“ok, you are 25 now, you’re a grown woman. Its not like your asking for a lifetime commitment and its not like you’ll end up marrying this person. It’s to build your confidence. Just email someone on there and if they don’t reply, then just move on and it’ll be ok”

So, after deliberating with My Angel & Devil sides. I thought, I can do this. Besides, they don’t know me, they’ll never meet me. After what seemed like hours (cos it was… lol) I picked a name “H.F”, why I picked him? well, because his name assured me he can speak good english and so I wouldn’t have to speak samoan alot (I only knew the basic’s) and with my sweaty palms and hand shaking still, I sent my first email. Pressing the SEND button was the hardest decision I had to make in my life up to that point lol scary stuff guys! hehe 

Now, If I was to put that first email on here, I will never hear the end of it lol As, looking back on it now, I was trying to sound funny, friendly and kind BUT I came across nervous, scared, serious and unsure of what the hell Im doing lol I mean… who ends their email with…

“well, if you want to know more, or if you want to be mates, then email me
back ok?… but if this is not your thing anymore, then I apologise in
advance for bugging you…”

*blushing* yeah yeah, only I would end an email like that. Well, 5 minutes later I got a reply and he wanted to be friends. Which was a shocker, i nearly fell of my chair. My curiosity as to where this was going gave me the courage to reply… lugggyyy he couldn’t see me having a panic attack and nearly fainting while I wrote my reply lol Next came the exchanging of pics OMG can I just hate photo’s. I dont have a problem when the pic’s are of others lol But of myself? OMG I agree with the people that say Camera’s add 10 kilo’s! (or is that only for Video Camera’s?)

I scanned the 100’s of photo’s on my pc, OMG what if he see’s me? (ah doh!) what if Im ugly? lol I even tried bribing Shar if I could send a pic of her instead but, of course she said NO!. In the end Shar picked out one. Pressing the send button was the 2nd hardest decision I’ve ever yeah yeah blah blah blah etc

Fastforward to November 2007. At this point we had sent 1000’s and 1000’s of emails to eachother. Averaging 20 emails a day EACH lol We knew eachother more than we knew ourselves. Our likes, dislikes, strengths, weaknesses, and it was all through Email’s, no chat, no phonecalls etc just Emails. Then the opportunity came up to meet him. My parents forced me to go to Samoa to take my Nana back. Nana was homesick and wanted to go back, so I was chosen to be her minder on the plane. I tried to get out of it. BUT I was put on the guilt trip by my parents. (they are soooo good at doing that!)

I emailed H.F to tell him that Im finally coming. He said we should meet. I froze. I thought to myself “What am I doing? should I or should I not meet him” Nana and I were on the plane, and I was still fighting with my decision to meet him. We landed in Samoa and were at home in Vaitele and I was still fighting it. It wasn’t until 4 days after I arrived, that my mum called and asked if I’ve gone over to meet H.F yet. Um No. lol. He might be a serial killer. Mum bluntly said to me “If he is a serio killa, he would of serio killa you online” lol good point mum.. plus I was curious… so I agreed to go meet H.F for lunch.

First meeting was weird. I was speechless. Not only because he was kinda cute lol but because here I was, face to face with the guy that knows me inside, knows everything about me, yet at that moment I felt like he was a stranger as we have never been in eachother’s presence. I avoided eye contact the whole time. lol. not because I was fa’amagaia or anything (well, just a little heehee) but because I didnt know what to say. So H.F did all the talking trying to ease my nervousness. After an hour of being together as he was showing me around town… I started getting comfortable being with him and I realised what he said in the emails was the truth. Which was good, he wasn’t a serio killa after all hehehe

Lunch on that day, Dinner on the next night, Movies on the next night, Night out on the town. I was loving this. By my 2nd week, we were talking and chatting like soulmates. I felt good. For the first time, I let my guard down. I couldn’t believe the feelings I had for this guy. This guy is loving, caring, forgiving, kind, respectful, a workaholic and family orientated. It was weird for me to find a guy like this lol 

The night before I left Samoa, I was dreading it. We took a walk along the seawall. I doubted we would see eachother again. I had this notion that guys in samoa are no good lol (my friends told me)

As we spoke about where we were in life, I said to him “who am I kidding? you’re too good for me. I have a past, and I don’t deserve you” he replied “we all have pasts, I’m not interested in your past, Im interested in your Now and your Future and to prove how much I love you….. *get’s on one knee with a ring EVEN!* Will you marry me? and make me the happiest and luckiest guy on Earth?” He melted my heart. And he continue’s to melt my heart today. We’re tying the knot in 5 months, and I couldn’t be happier. 

Curiosity is tricky, you either have a happy ending………. orrrrrr it could blow up in your face lol

Im lucky it didnt blow up in mine…. hehe

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cherryk

Am a Kiwi girl born in Invercargill raised in Saute Aukilani! DAD: Sagone/Safotu MUM: Fagamalo/Sataoa & married to my Hamo Guy from Vaimoso/Matautu-tai and living in Samoa. Moved here 7yrs ago and am still a survivor 🙂 and deserve an award!!! LOL MR & I have 4 beautiful kids Jericho (6) Elijah, Jasmine (2) and Shar (2months) and have come a lonnnnng long way from the wedding planning days! lol Been AWOL for the last 6 years but am back and got a lot of catching up to do! ENJOY!

7 thoughts on “The Power of Curiosity… in Internet Dating…

  1. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO @ Ur mum & her serio killer you online!!!!!! thats jus a classic!!!!

    AWWWWWWW im so happy that i got to the end of your blog & it was a happy ending!!!!!! I kept reading & thought please please I hope its not a tragic love story!!!! LOL I loved it!!!! All the best!!!

  2. Thanks for sharing this beautiful part of your relationship Cherry K! Sure made me smile(=

    Congratulations!

  3. ok so what website did you go on? lmao
    AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW *hugs*

    but im still laughing at how you ended your first email to him..buwhahaha its so cute…felt like i was there ha-ha

    fuly enjoyed the read buddy, its the best story ive heard that involved online meet ups. I rate that! haha.

    luv luv luv YA!

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